The loss of a pet can be one of the most painful and traumatic experiences a person can go through.
When my dog, Meesha, died suddenly in September of 2013, I was still in no way ready to celebrate the holidays. I trudged through events and smiled but my heart was broken. Christmas music (I’ll be honest, not my favorite to start with) was quickly cut off at the first “Tra.”
Something happens when you love an animal or a person deeply. They become a part of your heart. While I have no doubt that I will see Meesha again in Heaven, and I am glad for her that she gets to be in a perfect place, I would do just about anything to have her physically right here.
If you are in pain following the loss of a beloved animal (even if a long time has passed), avoid telling yourself that you need to “just move on”. Many people are “triggered” during the holidays to re-experience the pain of such an enormous loss. Although the message all around is that we should feel “joyful,” these messages can magnify the pain felt by the absence of our loved ones. I hope that some tips I have provided for dealing with pet loss will help if you are going through a difficult time:
Reaching out to trusted friends and family. Let them know what you are going through. Do not judge yourself for being sad, and tell them that you are having a difficult time. Be consciously aware and choose wisely who you share your feelings with. Some are just not able to relate to the loss of a pet, especially if they have never experienced this. Also, some people who have experienced loss have shut down and the emotion of others triggers something in them that they would like to avoid dealing with. Avoid putting yourself in a position where you may be further hurt at such a vulnerable time.
Slow down. Although you may feel pushed to spend less time relaxing during the holidays, it is important to take the time to be still and allow yourself to feel what you are feeling. Seek the comfort of God for answers to your questions about pain and loss. You may want to find a spiritual advisor or clergy person who can help you in this process. It’s ok not to feel up to all of the events and to feel out what is going to restore you verses obligations that may serve only to deplete you of energy. Attending some holiday events for a shorter period of time may serve to uplift but not overwhelm you.
Avoid isolating. Spending some time alone can be restorative, but the energy of others can help bring some hope and perspective. Also, getting out in the world may bring some surprising help from unexpected people and experiences.
Seek professional counseling. There are plenty of counselors who specialize in pet loss. Finding a counselor who can relate to your pain is essential so be picky about who you choose.
Pay special attention to what your body needs. Especially during the winter months with shorter periods of sunlight, try to take a walk outside during the day for at least 20-30 minutes to an hour. Studies show this can significantly improve mood. Eating non-processed foods and limiting caffine can be important, as well. You may want to try using essential oils for physical and emotional support.
Volunteer. This may seem counterintuitive, especially if you’re feeling like sequestering yourself at home under a warm blanket and hiding from all of the activity this season. However, opening our hearts to help others is one of the best ways to help us feel better when we are suffering. I joined a volunteer pet therapy team and prayer group at my church after Meesha passed that have led to immense blessings and helped me to move through that very difficult season.
Show yourself compassion. I still miss giving Meesha her present on Christmas morning. You may be years into loss and still experience pain and sadness. That means you loved deeply and were blessed to have your pet in your life for how ever long they were there. Acknowledge the loss of your loved one and give yourself a break from thinking as though you have to feel or act “happy” during the holidays.
How can I help? I provide Animal Communication
consultations and energy work during times of transition, grief and loss. I am also a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (L.C.S.W.) providing Personal Intuitive Coaching. MORE
consultations and energy work during times of transition, grief and loss. I am also a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (L.C.S.W.) providing Personal Intuitive Coaching. MORE
Note: the information provided here or on any affiliated media pages does not take the place of professional intervention. Anne Angelo Webb or Intuitive Touch Animal Care, LLC are not serving as a professional counselors, as this information is for informational and entertainment purposes only. If you are feeling that you are in any danger of self or other harm, please contact the appropriate professionals.
